wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
