honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Randomize
