And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
The ass gains better be worth it
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