he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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