Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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