everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
How does it feel to date your dad?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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