Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
it glows. i had to have it.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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