sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Randomize
