is your mom at the bar?
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
