Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I don't think brook has ever known best
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
