like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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