I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Randomize
