She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
