Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
