Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
