at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize