he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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