Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
