Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
