I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
