Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize