Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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