i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
