I'm jealous of your bromance
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize