drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
