So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
