I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
