maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
