Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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