i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
