Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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