Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
