What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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