Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
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