Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Randomize
