I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize