I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
