I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
