At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
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