You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
