you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
