I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Randomize
