Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
