Midget sex pt 2 tonight
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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