Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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