I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
