look no pants
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
