so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize
