No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
