Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
